Candy corn is sweet on Halloween

On the eve of All Hallows Eve, let's discuss the greatest candy to grace the face of the Earth: Candy corn.

There's nothing quite as sweet as the pure-sugar kernels. No candies are quite as colorful. And no seasonal snack tastes quite as good as this end-of-October delicacy.

Candy canes are good, but they require lots of licking and don't have the instantaneous gratification of a handful of candy corn. Marshmellow Peeps are great, but they can leave your hands yellow and sticky. And Valentine's Day candy just doesn't taste as sweet in those times when you have no one to buy it for you.

But candy corn is as good as it gets -- and it comes in variety. Hand over the extra buck for a name brand like Brach's and enjoy the taste of a delicious touch of honey. Opt for candy pumpkins and watch your blood sugar skyrocket to levels unseen since you were four years old after trick-or-treat. Or, if you're in the mood for a challenge, sit down with a bag of the harvest mix and try to guess whether you're eating a scarecrow or some other strange character stamped into a colored blob of glucose.

The only possible downside to candy corn is the possibility of addiction. I went through two bags in two weeks earlier this month and had to pull back to stripes of orange, yellow and white appearing on my skin. Now I'm waiting for post-Halloween candy sales.

And those sales always come. Drug stores usually manage to overstock bags of candy corn, which is like overstocking on diamonds -- everyone wants some. But after Halloween, the prices plummet, and you can get bags upon bags for peanuts ... kernels.

So hold out a few more days, candy lovers. Soon you can go on an enormous candy corn binge and save some cash. And it will be wondrous.

Apple of my eye

Here's a quick suggestion: Head to the nearest apple orchard as soon as possible.

That crisply fall feeling is in the air. You can still pick some delicious apples from the trees. And you can get fresh apple products from orchards and farms.

Apple cider is my personal favorite -- it's perfectly sweet and crisp this time of year. You can get the stuff all year round, but it doesn't taste nearly as clean as it does in the fall.

If you like your apples fresh, you can pick them right of the tree, too. There are plenty of orchards and farms willing to overcharge customers for a bag and the privilege of picking apples.

I say overcharge only because you'd pay a lot less for the produce in the grocery store. Still, there's nothing quite like pulling the fruit right off the tree. Just be careful, though, because there are usually plenty of apples lying at the feet of the trees, and they can be a nasty slipping hazard. On the positive side, those discarded apples can fill the entire orchard with a cidery smell.

So head out and enjoy the fruit of the harvest before it's all rotting on the ground or frozen in some grocery store's freezer. There's always something to be said for fresh fruit.

Erupting in mediocrity

It's got a pink taco shell! That means it has to be spicy! ... Right?

... Well ... no.

The pink taco shell, of course, adorns Taco Bell's latest cheap creation, the Volcano Taco. And it certainly makes the taco stand out from the crowd. You don't see many pink tacos.

At least you didn't see many pink tacos a few months ago. Now you can see a bunch when you head to a food court at the mall or take a peek in the window of your neighborhood Taco Bell.

That's not because the volcano tacos are particularly spicy. It's probably because they're cheap -- 89 cents to be exact. And when you don't have to pay a premium for a novelty taco shell, it's bound to be a good deal.

Aside from the peculiar pigment, the only real difference between a Volcano Taco and a regular Taco Bell taco is what Taco Bell calls "cheesy lava sauce." If we're talking flavor, it's neither cheesy nor lava-like. If we're talking cool factor, then the lava sauce is most definately cheesy. Lava sauce on a Volcano Taco -- just throw in some "basaltic vinaigrette" for an explosive good time.

But the taco isn't necessarily bad. That cheesy sauce might have a corny name, but it does add a nice texture and moisture to the snack. Taco Bell tacos typically provide a tasty set of mouthfuls for a low price, and this one is no different.

It's just not spicy. And for something that's called a "Volcano Taco," that can be a sizable fault.

Three sporks out of five.

More fare from the fair

The 2008 New York State Fair ended yesterday, leaving a nice aftertaste in my mouth. I made a second trip to the fairgrounds in Syracuse to try a few more foods. So if you're finding yourself getting indigestion from fair fare withdrawal, check out these review snippets.



$1 baked potato
5/5 sporks

Snuggled in the back corner of the horticulture building is one of the true gems of the fair: a stand selling $1 baked potatoes. You choose which toppings garnish your spud, making a delicious tater that matches your taste. I went with butter, sour cream and shredded cheese. My potato was piping hot and baked to perfection -- soft but not dried out.

Roasted corn on the cob
4/5 sporks
These ears are roasted while still in their husks, keeping in all sorts of moisture and sweetcorn flavor. These $3 ears are peeled and can be dunked in a vat of melted butter before they're handed to you. The only downside to corn on the cob is that it can get caught in your teeth.

Beer battered chicken sandwich
3/5 sporks
Plenty of crispy golden battering is sandwiched between two hearty pieces of bun, a nice piece of lettuce and an absolutely monstrous slice of tomato. Unfortunately, there isn't much chicken sandwiched between that breading. The $5 item still tastes good, but it could be called a "beer batter sandwich" just as easily.

All the fair food was pretty good. Just thinking about it has my heart burning for some more. But the smorgasbord of vendors won't be back for another year. That's probably a good thing -- my bank account needs the time to climb back up, and my cholesterol needs the time to fall back down.