I bet you're all famished

Hello again, foodies.

Be honest, how many of you thought you'd ever hear from your favorite cafeteria critiquer again? It's been fifteen months since I last offered a morsel of insight, during which time supermarket prices seemed to swell, value menus appeared to shrink and chain restaurants launched more dishes than a rocket full of dinnerware. We've missed free food giveaways, ill-fated culinary movie tie-ins and, no doubt, a fare share of tasty treats.

But today I tell you that your gastronomical deprivation is over. The great barren period, the long winter without taste, has ended. I'm back to grace the Internet with my infamous down-to-earth looks at meals that won't break the bank.

Some of you may question my absence. How, pray tell, could I keep the oven door slammed on your hungry faces for so long? I can offer no satisfying explanation. Let's simply chalk it up to labor issues and move on. The critique is resuming after the NFL and NBA resolved their lockouts, but at least it isn't waiting for the NHL to start skating again. I couldn't bear to keep you all on ice for that long.

You may have noticed that I've been doing some housecleaning in preparation for our return. You can't invite guests over to a dinner party without tidying up, after all. It's nothing fancy -- a new blog template, a clean color scheme, the removal of that cluttered old header. Hopefully you like the changes and find they let you focus all of your energies on the foods at hand … or mouth.

So keep your eyes peeled over the coming weeks for some fresh new content. I've been hitting the drive-thru, the grocery store and even an airline to bring you some of the best critiques you've ever laid eyes upon.